Tiger's Statement-Reading Reviews

I thought Bill Simmons did the best job encapsulating and critiquing Friday's circus.

Say this much about Tiger: People give a crap. I don't know anyone who didn't watch this morning's speech. There isn't another athlete -- not one -- who could have made the world stop from 11 to 11:15 like Tiger Woods did.

And with that, we're done with the positives. I thought it was a borderline train wreck. It amazes me that Tiger learned little to nothing from the past two months. The control freak whose life slipped out of control dipped right back into control-freak mode, reading a prepared speech in front of a hand-selected audience of people, taking no questions, talking in clichés and only occasionally seeming human. Everything about it seemed staged. Everything. When the main camera broke down at the nine-minute mark and Tiger had to be shown from the side, I half-expected to see that he was plugged in to the wall.

Jeff Rude at Golfweek writes:

Specifically, Woods used the word “I” 108 times, “me” 33 times, “Elin” 10 times, “behavior” nine, a form of “apology” eight, “wife” seven and “family” six. Generally, he was more candid than I thought he might be, given the controlled nature of a session in which questions were not allowed.

We learned he is sorry for letting so many people down with his irresponsible and selfish behavior. We learned he spent 45 days in therapy and is headed back tomorrow. We learned he wants to be a born-again Buddhist after having lost his way. We learned he wants to change. We learned he is introspective like never before.

Lawrence Donegan, writing for The Guardian:

The casual observer may have been happy to accept Woods' 12-word dismissal of the claims that he "used performance-enhancing drugs" but anyone who has been paying attention during this scandal appreciates that this brief and angry rebuttal comes nowhere close to answering all the issues arising from his relationship with a Toronto-based doctor, Anthony Galea, who has been charged with importing banned drugs into Canada and who treated the world No 1 during his recovery from knee surgery.

Nor should his assertion that he kept a distance between his family and his sponsorship activities be allowed to pass unchallenged. This, frankly, was untrue. Woods' image as a "family man", was to be trawled out whenever it was commercially expedient, as it was in Australia just days before the edifice began to crumble.

"Does family come first?'' he was asked. "Always," he replied.

The Guardian solicited a few reactions, including yours truly and agent Chubby Chandler, who says:

This morning people were still asking other players about Tiger Woods, at a time when they are trying to win a golf tournament. I didn't see or hear anything that suggested to me that this couldn't have been done on Mondayº

Geoffrey Beattie, body language expert, also had this to say:

People would be right to be slightly cynical about the moment where he put his hand on his heart. The whole thing came across as staged; his patterns of eye appeals were very well co-ordinated. Every time he expressed remorse, it was straight to camera.

That points to rehearsal – no one does that spontaneously. He made sure he looked into the camera for the bits he wanted to be perceived as heartfelt. When you want to appeal to someone you look at them but it doesn't happen every time – with real nonverbal behaviour a person may do that spontaneously 60-70% of the time, but not all of it.

However, it was interesting that at those key points, his blink rate went up and his swallowing rate went up. Both are signs of acute anxiety. And to my mind those weren't rehearsed, they were a natural response.

Jeff Babineau of Golfweek writes:

We live in a world where everyone is a critic, and certainly there was no shortage of opinions being bantered in a ballroom filled with a few hundred media from around the globe a mile away from the TPC clubhouse where Woods spoke. Some bought into Woods’ speech, calling it absolutely brilliant. Others found it too stiff, too scripted. A news man seated near me from the Times of London gave it “a 2 out of 10.” Some thought not enough of his speech seemed to come from the heart.

Really, who is to say whether or not all those words came from the very bottom of Woods’ heart, or can feel the real emotions that were churning inside? One man knows, in all honesty. The same man who made many apologies on Friday, yet realizes his actions in the days, months and years to follow will be what will define the effectiveness of the thoughts he conveyed on this surreal morning.

Garry Smits touches on the Michael Jordan rumors:

The M.J. Rumor: It really swept the room about 10 a.m. that Michael Jordan was going to be at the TPC Sawgrass clubhouse in the room with Tiger as a show of support. It didn't happen. Did anyone think the Woods family or his agent would allow Jordan to participate? Supposedly, a lot of Tiger's extra-curricular activities were with Jordan and Charles Barkley in Vegas.

John Feinstein files this for the Washington Post:

He apologized to almost everyone he had ever crossed paths with. He looked sad and choked up at times. He said that he had learned from his mistakes and is still learning after spending 45 days in a rehabilitation center -- though he never specifically mentioned where he had gone seeking help. He tried very hard to sound humbled.

He didn't pull it off.

Brian Wacker writing for PGATour.com noted that Tiger was driven "out the front gate of TPC Sawgrass in a separate car, while the other vehicles he arrived in departed from the rear of the club," and leads his piece this way:

Here's what we know after Tiger Woods' first public appearance since he crashed his SUV in the early-morning hours after Thanksgiving and subsequently admitted to a series of extramarital affairs:

He is "deeply sorry" for his "irresponsible and selfish" behavior.

He spent the last 45 days from the end of December until early February in inpatient therapy.

He will return to therapy Saturday and return to golf "one day."

With the exception of confirming that he has in fact been in rehab and specifying the number of days, that's not a whole lot more than we already knew.

Steve Elling writes:

If Woods is a born-again person, early evidence to support that premise is mixed. After all, based on the way the ground rules of his proclamation speech were set forth -- only invitees and a select group of writers were allowed to attend and Woods only spoke from a prepared text -- he's apparently the same control freak he has always been.

There were snatches of his true character during the monologue, like when he became openly defiant about his perceived invasion of privacy. Midway through the speech it turned into a veritable lecture about the attention the media has shone on his shameful actions and family -- which happened as a direct result of his decision to dive for cover for nearly three months.

Indignant disdain is a far more familiar face for Woods.

Andrew Both reports that Frank Nobilo wasn't too impressed:

"When a man says he's sorry, you've got to applaud that, but why couldn't it have been done a couple of months ago," said former professional Frank Nobilo, now an analyst on the American Golf Channel.

"He wants everybody to stay away from his family (but) if this had come out a couple of months ago he would have protected his family a little better.

"He's accused the media of hounding his family (but) he sadly threw the people who'd already been hurt smack bang in the middle of the fire."

Brad Klein, filing for Golfweek.com:

For 14 minutes, we saw a man acknowledging those limits and trying to grow up publicly. It promises to be an interesting show. It’s not clear when and how much of the next episodes we’ll see. But the viewing will be compelling. What could have been a re-run of “Entertainment Tonight” or a celebrity talk show is starting to look more like HBO’s “In Treatment” or “The Sopranos."

Ron Sirak at GolfDigest.com:

What Woods said and the way he delivered his words will likely not change the minds of those who have already formed a negative opinion about him. Those who do not like him will say the event was too staged and will say the attempt to control the media was too typical of his at times imperious behavior.

But those who still want to believe in him will find hope when Woods uttered the words: "I want to say to each of you simply and directly, I am deeply sorry for my irresponsible and selfish behavior I engaged in." Later he said: "It's hard to admit that I need help, but I do."

Mark Spencer writes:

 Many people and organizations incurred expenses at covering what you say is a "private matter".  How is that right, Tiger?

Sorry, Tiger, but it is my business...you made it that way.

I am my two sons' role model.  I treat their mother with respect and love, and I am polite to others.  I understand that a child is watching everything we do...with that, it is important for them not only have me as a role model, but it is helpful for them to have heros.  To take away a child's hero is to take away a child's dreams.  And you have taken away the hero of so many children it is sad.

Tiger, you have profited from people that spend money on products you endorse.  Your family is part of that image...and with each successful partnership, you were able to increase your monetary gains.

And it was all based on lies...so sorry Tiger, I cannot believe you.  I have too much at stake.  When your actions show that you've changed, you'll at least get my attention.

Gary Van Sickle reports that players gave Tiger rave reviews:

Farmers Insurance Open champion Ben Crane said Tiger’s situation reminded him of a famous tale.

“One of my favorite stories in the Bible talks about a woman who has sinned—a prostitute—and they bring her before Jesus and says, shouldn’t we stone her? Shouldn’t we kill her for all these bad things she’s done?” Crane said. “And Jesus says, yes, absolutely, stone her. But you without sin be the one to cast the first stone.”

As for Tiger’s performance, Crane added, “I thought it was an amazing conference. I thought Tiger was very humble. I think everything he did is going to help him.”

And on that note, I leave you with The Onion's take. Viewer discretion advised!