"The only way to get this guy to play is to buy him."

Someone won a golf tournament this week (Retief Goosen), so he must be the new Masters favorite if you are following SI's Golf Plus/golf.com/Golf Magazine/AOL/Time Warner Cable dissertation, which stretches to a new record four pages.

But they make up for the expected love for the latest winner by defecating all over the Tavistock Cup and offering this spirited exchange on Tiger's $3 million appearance fee for the Australian Masters.

Gorant: If things get worse over there, it would be interesting if Tiger showed up and got booed or picketed by protestors.

Herre: Not all the dough is from taxpayers, about half is. And Tiger will be leaving a chunk in Australia as he will be taxed there on the $3 million. The reality is that he isn't making that much off the trip. I think it's one of those "expanding the brand" things. Also, heaven knows the Australian tour could use a lift. It's been hurting for years.

Gorant: It's 48% in taxes. Interesting side note on Tiger's motivation: the event is run by IMG.

Shipnuck: My favorite part of the blowback was Tiger's agent, Mark Steinberg, saying that his famous client was basically going because he really, really wanted to play Kingston Heath. I've been there, and it is indeed a great course, but I don't think that's why Tiger is getting on the plane.

Van Sickle: Tiger's trip Down Under should be a lesson to those trying to recruit Tiger for their own tournaments. The only way to get this guy to play is to buy him. Either a $3 million appearance fee overseas, or an endorsement deal (like AmEx and Buick) or have a tournament run by IMG (Deutsche Bank, AT&T). Judging by his last-minute entry even into the WGC event at Doral, he's not going to be pro-active on Finchem's request for the tour's stars to play more. Pay him and he'll play.

Maybe the folks running the Skins Game will...oh right, they already did that too!