"Drop your putter, dig your cell phone out of your golf bag, and call 1.877.9NM.GIFT."

I would not have believed this one if not for Ryan Herrington's item in this week's Golf World Bunker. There's selling out, there's whoring out and then there's another indescribable level of unfathomable desperation as evidenced from item in the new Neiman Marcus catalog...

Jack Nicklaus Custom Backyard Course Package

Go ahead, re-read it. Yes, THE Jack Nicklaus, Golfer of the Century turned world-renowned course designer. Yep, your very own custom-designed three-hole course. Uh-huh, for your backyard. Jack will study topography, aerial photos, and landscape maps for the site, then send his team to survey the property. He'll create a formal design plan and color renderings for up to three holes and a practice area, depending on the size of your back forty. Your construction crew builds from it, with supervision from Jack's world-class design team (the same team pursued by premier club owners worldwide). Now to sink the winning putt; when your course is finished, the Golden Bear himself will stop by to play the first round with you, personally. More? He'll sign his club and ball for your collection and throw in a custom set of Nicklaus clubs, including a personalized bag.

Drop your putter, dig your cell phone out of your golf bag, and call 1.877.9NM.GIFT.

Jack Nicklaus Custom Backyard Course Package
Price Beginning at $1,000,000.00*
OCBF9_NMO3603
*Construction and site preparation costs not included.

For $1,000,000 you get some plans and a site visit? So, how is that different from a normal Nicklaus design?

No word yet on whether Neiman's new favorite customer will be buying one of these for Todd.