"You've also got the cultural pressure, particularly the Asian pressure."

What was that I wrote about Bivens being the better commissioner? And now this interview with Golfweek's Beth Ann Baldry. It's as if Baldry startled her in the night...

In regards to drug testing, do you feel like you put pressure on PGA Tour commissioner Tim Finchem (by announcing the LPGA would become the first tour to have a drug-testing program)?

Tim Finchem has a whole different set of issues that he's dealing with. We did what's right for us.

Would you like to see the PGA Tour follow (the LPGA's lead)?

I don't care if the PGA Tour follows. My concern is the LPGA.

KInd of makes you long for that wordy, meaningless, empty spin. Okay, now it just gets weird. 

The LPGA has hired Shirley Shin to help Asian players study transcripts to better their English skills.

We've also had Shirley walking the pro-ams with the South Korean players. (She is teaching) conversational English. How do you help an amateur player line up a putt?

How do you listen to the associate vice president from ShopRite tell a boring hole-by-hole story? How do act like you actually care that your team might crack the top ten in the pro-am? Oh sorry... 

It's functional English if you will. ...

A subject Bivens knows something about: speaking functional English. Barely.

I think we've heightened the sensitivity that we are an international tour, and when we're here in this country everyone that plays on this tour ought to have a command of the English language. ... You've got some cultural barriers there, parents who for the most part think any hour that's not spent practicing is a wasted hour. You've also got the cultural pressure, particularly the Asian pressure, that if you don't do something really well, then you don't do it.

Hey, you got love her honesty. Uh, the Asian pressure. Is that like, The Google?

How do you bring the average fan on board when the leaderboard is dominated by Koreans?

The English is part of it. We just got some great research from the Bonham Group back called the Barrier Study.

Oh no, it's got a name. The Barrier Study. A satirists dream come true. 

One of the reasons very avid sports fans or very avid golf fans don't make the transition to the LPGA is when they watch the television coverage, they don't know enough about the women that they're watching. When we watch the PGA (Tour), we know just about everything there is to know about Tiger Woods or Phil Mickelson, their childhood, who they are married to, everything about them. ...

Well, I don't know if we know everything about Phil! And we still haven't seen all five bathrooms of Privacy.

It's especially true for the Asian players; the media tends to talk about them monolithically. Paula (Creamer) is as different from Natalie (Gulbis) as any other player. It's building those personalities and letting people know.

Monolithically? They didn't teach me how to use that word at Pepperdine.

How about making the cut 60 and ties (instead of 70) or limiting the fields to 120?

There are a number of issues overall, I would consider them very seminal issues, that the LPGA needs to address in the next couple years. The size of fields. As we play better and better golf courses it gets more difficult to get 140 women around them.

Interesting. The better the course, the slower the round? Hmmm...no, the hillier, longer and more spread out by housing developments, the longer it takes. Nice try though! 

In regards to ShopRite, people keep telling me the other side of the story isn't being reported. What is your side?

I think that what has gotten missed is that we tried to contact the Harrisons (tournament owners Larry and Ruth) repeatedly. We had met with every tournament owner before we got to their tournament except the Harrisons. The Harrisons are difficult to deal with under the best of circumstances. By the way, the ShopRite people had nothing to do with this and they really don't like their name being brought into this. ... There's two messages that have gotten out in some cases and we just plain haven't been able to reel back in. One is that we were very capricious and the (ShopRite) date went to the highest bidder. No. 2 is that we just don't care about long-term sponsors. Again, not the case.

Capricious. Uh, according to answers.com: Characterized by or subject to whim; impulsive and unpredictable. That could never describe our Carolyn!

There's been a lot written about your husband's (frequent) presence in the media room. How should people interpret his presence.

I travel 40-45 weeks a year. We ripped our lives from Los Angeles, where he was close to his kids and where he had a life, to come here and do this. This is not my first marriage. If you look at the last few commissioners, it's not a good track record. I don't intend to be subject to that again. Bill has nothing to do with running the tour. He does enjoy the players and the caddies.

Enjoys the players and the caddies. Eh, that might not have been the best way to put that.

Do you ever feel like, as a woman, you have to come across a little bit tougher to prove yourself?

I actually try to do the opposite because when I say 'No, I don't think that's the best way to do things,' it comes across very differently than when a man says the same thing. I try to stay back at least until I've worked with people or developed a relationship that's strong enough to maybe come straight ahead at it. (NBA commissioner) David Stern is one of my role models. I look at some of the things that David has been through this past year and he's reported as being very decisive, very pragmatic, doing exactly what has to be done.

Yes, he's been through a lot. Cashing that $10 million paycheck can be such a burden.

I'm reported as being take-it-or-leave-it, arrogant. It's different words that are describing the same behavior. (Whether it's with) television, production media, tournament owners, sponsors, I don't want to say that I'm coming across as softer, but I'm trying very hard to make sure (it's known) the reputation I'm being tattooed with isn't the way we operate.

Well, this interview ought to really help!